I tend to believe that silence is golden. Following recent events, it is now time to break my silence, What follows is heartfelt and all I wish to say on the subject.
This much is true – Bizzy Bees Events LLC, once a partnership is not anymore. To some this is not news and others won’t have known because they were not affected by it. But for those who have the time has come to state my views.
I know I have remained pretty silent about the breakup of the partnership. My silence was not based on any kind of arrogance or feeling right because it didn’t feel that way at all. Actually at times it felt painful, uncomfortable and just plain not right. When I get confused, disappointed, lose direction and such I tend to pull my feelings inside. I pray. I think and evaluate. I read. I look for a clear direction and second guess myself in the pursuit of the right answer.
My silence was an endeavor to take the high road. I do not enjoy or wish to engage in personal attacks over a business situation. I had hoped that this would be the attitude of everyone involved. However I know some among you have received emails and other communication from others that indicates to me otherwise.
For the record, the partnership officially ended in early February following an event. I struggled with the way forward prior to this (believe me I did!). It took me weeks of vacillating back and forth to come to a decision and it was not an easy one for me. Nor was it void of emotion as some seem to think. It was difficult.
And while I would like to have avoided the difficulty the reality is sometimes life gets messy. Sometimes something just has to end.
Business partnerships and their breakups really remind me of marriage and divorce. In the beginning you are in the honeymoon phase – everything seems right, everyone is on the same page and there is an excitement about the future. But over time things can change. Partners change their vision for the direction of the business. Partners can disagree on things just like a married couple would. Communication is key but often breaks down. You get my drift here without going further.
In the course of my looking realistically at where we were business-wise I read something – 6 Signs It’s Time To Break Up – With Your Business Partner. While all of this did not apply, some of the things covered in this article were very real and true to me at the time.
Please don’t misread what I am saying here. I am not saying I am right and my former partners were wrong. It was not about right or wrong, just differences of opinion. I will only say that things were not working the way I had originally envisioned. We didn’t seem to see things the same. It plain and simple wasn’t working out.
Sometimes the best you can do at the end of the day is agree to disagree.
To be clear there were and still are no bad feelings on a personal level from my perspective. Yes some frustration from a business perspective like feeling the side effects of the communication crumbling but I did not walk away with any malice, ill will or any other type of negative emotion towards any individual.
So I kept pretty silent. For reasons I have explained but maybe should elaborate further. I wanted to take time to let the dust settle, emotions die down and create a little distance. Did I second guess and struggle with my decision? Maybe so to the extent I felt for a time like it could have been worked out and the issues were pretty simple.
My late mother would be laughing at me for having even acknowledged this because I used to get annoyed at her for saying it. Maybe it is the (as she always said) Pollyanna in me – who wants to look at the good and optimistic in every situation even when in fact it has failed or isn’t for the best. My mother always said I was like that sometimes. My always wanting to see the good in things clouded my judgment.
Subconsciously maybe I hoped a little distance, space and time would help. Many say time heals a lot of things. In that respect, making a formal announcement about the breakup of the partnership made it seem oh so final. Yes I guess I admit I held out a little hope that the distance might make things clearer for each of us and that might have been a talking point but it didn’t turn out that way.
In the aftermath some very unfortunate things have happened in my opinion. In those I realize I have a choice – to be bitter or better. I choose the latter. So I will not dignify the content of any recent emails or things being said with a rebuttal.
For those who have recently taken the liberty to criticize me and weigh in on the breakup of a business you were never involved in, please be clear on one thing. This was MY decision – by right and by choice. I take 100% full responsibility for it and despite any desire on my part to avoid it a decision had to be made. It was a business decision. None of this was personal.
No one has the right to judge or say they know better from the outside looking in. I based my decision on one simple factor – it was not working out – and that does not make any of us involved in the partnership bad people. There was no failure although it feels like it. There was no winner in all of this. It was what it was.
My blunt statement to those who want to sit by and judge from the outside and weighed in on this issue is – shame on you! You have not walked in my shoes. You do not know every nuance of what went on, what the struggles were and how this decision has perhaps not been easy. Well I can speak for myself and know it was not for me.
Ultimately this was MY business decision – one that others should respect and no one has the right to say what the right path is for anyone else. It is a decision I stand by. My eyes have been opened in recent days to those who thrive on drama, controversy and the need to be involved in other people’s business. I guess in that revelation they took themselves out of my circle and I have to say I probably will not feel the loss. Sad but true.
While on the subject of business decisions, there is a point that seems to have been missed in all the speculation and gossip about a recent change with an event and charity. That point is just as we are all business owners, this is also business for them. Non-profits and charities still make business decisions – the ones that are best for them and their bottom line. That decision is no more personal than my decision about the partnership was. Anyone who would condemn a charitable organization for taking what they view to be the best business deal is downright wrong.
It is disheartening to know that there are those out there casting blame or judgment on any of the parties involved and especially the charity. I am not naming names here for obvious reasons – those who know already know.
On that note, I wish to state it is not my intention to dwell on this, engage in negativity or badmouth anyone. It is time to move on! Really it is! For me, I have grieved the loss, accepted the fact that this didn’t work and I am moving on. There is too much to be done to put positive out into the world and I will not engage in negative attacks or participate in that which brings any of us all down.
Hard moments in life and our reactions define us – who we are and what we believe. I want the message I send to be that no matter what negativity floats around me I will rise above it. I will not stoop to meet it.
To those who have been supportive and there for me during this transition with Bizzy Bees, please know that I deeply I appreciate it and you! We have a great team of vendors and charities that I value and respect. I appreciate those who have been loyal, tried to remain neutral and those who did not rush to judgment based on anything they heard. You are the reason I do what I do and you inspire me to continue.
Now let’s put this behind us and get bizzy!
Owner of Bizzy Bees Events LLC